


Fighting Thoughts

by Silent_Chick



Category: No Fandom
Genre: Dialogue Heavy, Dialogue-Only, Original Character(s), Original Story - Freeform, thoughts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-03
Updated: 2017-12-03
Packaged: 2019-02-09 21:46:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,005
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12897495
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Silent_Chick/pseuds/Silent_Chick
Summary: The good and bad thoughts of Amelia's mind finally have a conversation.





	Fighting Thoughts

"Hey, my name is Amelia."

_"My name is also Amelia."_

"Maybe... Maybe we should introduce ourselves in a different way. What do you think?"

_"For sure."_

"Okay well, you could call me Good."

_"And I guess you could call me Bad."_

"To explain why we introduced ourselves with the same name is because we come from the same place."

_"Amelia's mind."_

"Right. And although there may not seem to be a difference between us that's obvious just yet, we're total opposites."

_"Yeah. I tell her that what she wants is too far away for her to possibly grasp in her lifetime."_

"And I tell her as long as she works hard and really wants it, then she'll get everything she wants."

_"But what Good may say the problem is here, is that I'm starting to take over."_

"A huge problem because Amelia doesn't listen to me anymore."

_"Amelia listens to me. And every day she keeps to herself and she's down and out. Mainly because she's not seeing a way out."_

"There is a way out for her."

_"But I only make her think of one way."_

"And I give her millions."

_"Depression. Anxiety. Loneliness. They all come from me."_

"Happiness. Love. Passion... That's what I used to be able to give her."

_"See here's the reason why I took over. People kept telling her she wasn't living right. Meaning what is in her heart isn't in her mind."_

"...We all believed that was untrue..."

_"After hearing it so many times... she doesn't know what to believe anymore."_

"Two voices was more than enough..."

_"She has no guidance. She's young, so it's easy to mold her mind into anything you would want to..."_

"Only problem is her mind is being molded with the wrong thoughts."

_"Introvert. She keeps her emotions to herself. She was never taught how to outwardly expose them."_

"They bottle up."

_"And then I untwist the lid."_

"She snaps on someone close to her."

_"Never meaning what she says, but since they were the last person to piss her off... why not give them the whole damn bottle."_

"...It's unhealthy..."

_"You know what's unhealthy?"_

"What's that?"

_"That she doesn't he an appetite anymore."_

"In what way?"

_"In all ways... She loses her train of thought in the middle of anything she does. She doesn't really eat much on a day to day basis because she's always thinking about her weight... She has no desire to interact with her own family."_

"You're right..."

_"She's already pushed her friends away..."_

"But she's not alone."

_"You've told her already, but like you said earlier, she's not listening, is she?"_

"Sadly, no."

_"Like many others, she tells herself that she doesn't care about what other people think about her. It's not a lie."_

"But she does."

_"That's because I make her. I make her because I want her to feel even more worse about herself."_

"Why?"

_"That I can't answer. I don't even know the answer myself. I guess you could say I control her demons."_

"She could get help."

_"Help only irritates her."_

“Why?”

_“She feels like she can handle everything herself.”_

“Let me guess, you’re in control of that also.”

_“No, I’m not. Her pride is.”_

“Her pride is? What does her pride have to do with this?”

_“Everything.”_

“Confidence, self-value, and pride… I see.”

_“Good, maybe we’re only half of the problem.”_

“We?”

_“Yes, Good. We. You’re just as much in fault as I am.”_

“How so?”

_“You make her want to strive for best she can be. There’s nothing wrong with that, but when it has to do with something she has no clue on how to start in. That’s the problem.”_

“That’s because you tell her she can’t do it!”

_“That’s because I’m telling her the truth, Good! You need to start telling her, ‘yes, you can do this, but you need to be ready to fail if you attempt it’. I may be bad, Good, but even I want to see her be the best she can be. Do you think I like putting her down all the time?”_

“Honestly, yes…”

_“Well, I don’t… Because the more I do it the more she loses you and if you’re not there, there will not be a balance. And the way out I give her will the one she takes without a second thought.”_

“So… You’re not all bad?”

_“No, I’m only this way because you’ve given up…”_

“…I don’t know what else to do…”

_“Fight me. You fight every GODDAMN thing I say to her and you make me back down!”_

“How do I do that? You’re stronger than me…”

_“Am I? Or is that what you want to believe?”_

“…”

_“It’s easier to blame me for every fucking failure you commit.”_

“I’m not a failure.”

_“That’s the way it’s looking.”_

“You’re the failure.”

_“How so?”_

“You would rather have her sit in self-pity, loneliness, and sadness!!!”

_“Isn’t that the way you want her to be since you’ve kept your trap shut?!?”_

“No, it’s not the way I want her to be! You’re fucking pathetic! I’ve had it with you and the corrupt bullshit you feed her. I don’t know why you were even created. She can do every goddamn thing she puts her mind to if she wants to. Why don’t you go back to where you came from, Bad?!? I’m tired of seeing her so alone. She’s a ball of blinding beautiful light, but you’ve turned it with your nasty nasty words into something so dim no one can see it anymore. Well, that’s over now! I’ve had it! She’s going to be happy and all of her passions will come back to her and it will be like she never left. Like you never existed. There was never a balance between the two of us. I was always greater than you and I will be returning to that. You’ll be stuck with your negativity only slipping through the seams like you used to be…”

_“…There’s the Good I know…”_

**Author's Note:**

> I started writing this when I was going through one of my rough patches. I started it because this is the only way I knew how to express what I was going through, but at the same time keep it to myself. I'm aware that's not the greatest way to go about it. But I didn't want anyone to judge me and tell me what they thought I should do with myself. I had to learn how to accept my life as it is at the moment. Had to learn to love myself. And I can honestly say, I'm in the greatest state of mind I've been in all year. I'm tired of being down and I refuse to go back. So, I finished this little dialogue story a little bit before I uploaded it. I hope this helps someone else, even just a little bit.
> 
> Comments and Kudos are always welcomed!!! <3


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